How to Get Parents to Know, Like, and Trust You

Welcome back to Special Education for Beginners! In this week’s episode, we’re continuing our November theme of Family Ties: Strengthening Parent Partnerships in Special Education—and today, we’re digging into one of the most foundational strategies: helping families know, like, and trust you.

As special educators, we’re often the case manager, service provider, and meeting facilitator all rolled into one—but to a parent, we’re still just a new face sitting across the table talking about their child. That’s a huge emotional gap, and if we want to create meaningful, long-lasting partnerships, we’ve got to close that gap intentionally.

🔑 In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why familiarity matters when working with families of students with disabilities
• How to intentionally introduce yourself and build initial trust, even when parents are guarded or uncertain
• Easy ways to become someone parents actually enjoy working with (hint: it’s not about being perfect—it’s about being real)
• Why follow-through builds trust—and what can happen when you drop the ball
• Practical tools that support consistent, meaningful, and professional communication all year long

This episode is filled with real talk from the classroom and practical tips you can implement tomorrow to make your parent communication stronger and more sustainable.

🧰 Featured Resource:

💛 Parent Communication Logs & Reports

This tool was built specifically to help you:

• Track every phone call, email, or note home
• Keep a record of what you promised and what parents shared
• Share positive feedback with easy-to-use templates
• Use a Parent Survey to learn how each family wants to communicate
• Keep IEP conversations clear and organized with printable documentation forms

Whether you're printing and filing or using it digitally with Google Forms, this resource makes it simple to stay organized, intentional, and relationship-focused.

🎯 Grab the resource here

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Chapters

• 0:00 Setting The Trust Agenda
• 0:43 Host Intro And Mission
• 1:40 Why New Families Feel Guarded
• 3:24 Communication As Safety And Strategy
• 4:12 Help Parents Know You
• 5:11 Practical Ways To Be Likable
• 7:29 Trust Built On Follow Through
• 8:22 Tools: Logs, Notes, And Surveys
• 9:51 Link, Next Week, And Sign Off

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

Well, hey there, welcome back to Special Education for Beginners. Today we are continuing our November theme about strengthening parent partnerships in special education. Last week we talked about creating a physical space that feels welcoming to parents during IEP meetings. This week we are shifting to something a little deeper and honestly a little more personal. Because at the end of the day, all of the tools, visuals, and welcoming strategies that I shared about last week won't make a difference if the parent sitting across from you doesn't trust you. So in today's episode, we are digging into one of the most important dynamics in our work, how to get parents to know, like, and trust you. It's all about building connections, having transparency, and showing up in a way that builds long-term partnerships with families. So let's get to it. Hey, special educator. Are you overwhelmed by the absurd amount of paperwork on your to-do list? Do you wish you had the skills to build a rock solid team with your staff? Do you find yourself scouring the internet for how to meet the needs of each student on your caseload? Well, hey there, I'm Jennifer Hofferberg, an award-winning veteran special education teacher and current instructional coach who has walked in your shoes through each of these challenges. And yes, I have the metaphorical blisters to prove it. I have cried your tears and felt your pain, and now I'm here to support you in the way I wish someone would have been there to support me. Listen in each week as my guests and I dish out practical wisdom to help you handle all the classroom curveballs that are thrown at you and learn how to laugh in spite of the chaos to celebrate those small yet significant victories that only a special educator can understand. So, are you ready? Wipe your tears and put on your superhero cape because together we are going to learn how to survive and thrive in the ever-crazy, completely overwhelming laugh so you don't cry profession of being a special education teacher. Okay, so before we can build deep collaborative partnerships with families, we have to start at the very beginning. For some of your programs, you might have students who have been with you for a few years and you've already built a solid relationship with those families. You've got a rhythm, a level of comfort, and maybe even a few inside jokes shared at IEP meetings. And that's great. Keep nurturing those connections. But what about the new families? Because a special education caseload is never the same from the beginning of a school year to the end of one. You will most likely have students who are tested and placed into your program or who just transferred in mid-semester. Or you could have parents who, for whatever reason, haven't had much contact with the school before. To these families, you are just a new face sitting across the table talking about their child. Sure, you've got a title, a role, and a folder of paperwork, but to them, you're just a new face at a very emotional table. And when you're talking about something as personal and as important as their child, that unfamiliarity can really feel uncomfortable. You're talking about goals, services, and evaluations all while they are still trying to read you and figure out who you are. And understandably, that can create an emotional gap. Parents of students with special needs are often guarded because of past experiences, times when they felt unheard, misunderstood, judged, or even dismissed by educators, specialists, or entire systems. They've had to advocate fiercely, sometimes even fight to get their child what they need. And those battles leave scars. So when they meet you for the first time, they're not just listening to what you're saying, they're watching you closely to see if you're different. Are you listening? Do you care? Can they trust you? That's why it's not enough to just be qualified. We have to be intentional about helping families feel safe with us. We have to show them who we are consistently and clearly until they know us, like working with us, and trust us to stand alongside them. And one of the best ways to do that is with strong, consistent communication. I have a resource called Parent Communication Logs and Reports that will help you stay organized, proactive, and relationship-centered with editable templates, positive notes home, and even a parent survey that puts family voice right where it belongs at the center of the process. So let's break this all down together and talk about exactly how to use this tool to build lasting partnerships with the families and build that know, like, and trust factor. So before you can expect parents to open up, collaborate, or even feel comfortable asking questions, we have to start by making ourselves known. That doesn't just mean introducing yourself at the IEP meeting. It means creating a sense of approachability that invites that trust you want them to have in you. A few practical ways you can help families get to know you are to start with an introduction letter or an email, use the start of the year or any new case assignment as a chance to introduce yourself, share what you teach, how long you've been in special education, why you do what you do, and something personal. People remember the human connection more than your credentials. And then you want to let them know how and how often you will check in. Will you send home a daily summary? Will it be weekly? Will it be through email or a folder? What expectations do you have for them? What expectations do they have for you, and how can they reach you if they have questions? Be proactive. Proactively communicating that you are accessible and invested builds familiarity and connection quickly. Okay, so now that they know us, it's time to give them reasons to like us. When I was still in the classroom, I would pride myself on the fact that parents liked me. I worked really, really hard to build connections. When a parent likes you, they are more willing to collaborate with you, they are more open to feedback, they are less confrontational, and they are more confident that their child is in good hands. And that can change everything. And in special education where emotions run high and the stakes feel personal, that likability stuff isn't just fluff, it's strategy. It lays the foundation for respectful, productive partnerships. And our jobs are hard enough, so why not go above and beyond for parents, not just for their benefit, but for ours too? When parents feel heard, seen, and supported, everything will start to run a little smoother. Conversations will be more collaborative, meetings will feel less tense, concerns come with solutions instead of accusations, and there's a shared sense of we are in this together. Now being likable doesn't mean being perfect, it just means showing parents that you see them, you value their child, and you are someone they can count on. So if you're thinking, okay, how do I build that kind of relationship, especially when time is limited and caseloads are full, well, don't worry, it doesn't take a big performance or a grand gesture. It just takes small, intentional moments. So some strategies that build likability is to send a positive note home. A positive note home can be one of the easiest ways to give parents a reason to like you. A little note saying, hey, Michael helped a classmate clean up today without being asked can be a big deal to parents. It may seem trivial, small, and insignificant to you, but it can really change a parent's entire day. Another one is to ask for their voice and not just their signature. Invite parents to share what's working at home, what strategies they use, or what they hope their child will gain this year. Use that information to personalize your support and mention it in your updates. Hey, I tried that visual countdown you suggested and it worked great today. And then third, show respect for their lived experiences. Many families come to us carrying a heavy burden. They carry fear, guilt, or frustration. Treat their experiences as valid. When they feel respected and listened to, they begin to like you and eventually see you as someone they can trust. And speaking of trust, that is the third part of building the lasting parent relationship. And in my opinion, trust comes from one thing, follow through. You can say all the right things at the meeting, you can make parents feel heard in the moment, and you can lay out the most beautiful service plan. But if you don't follow through on what you promised, it starts to erode everything you worked to build. When you don't follow through, parents start to question your words, even when they are sincere. Their guard goes back up. They become less responsive to you, they become less cooperative, and they become less likely to believe that you are really on their child's side. And in some cases, they may even escalate concerns to your admin or skip collaboration entirely because they feel unheard or dismissed. Even small things like saying you'll send home a visual schedule and then forgetting can feel like a big deal to a parent who is clinging to hope or struggling to trust the system. And that is why having a system in place is so important. I mean, you can tell yourself all day long that you won't forget, but let's be real, when you are juggling it all, something is bound to slip your mind. And relying on a mental checklist, some random notebook scribbles, or sticky notes stuck to your laptop just isn't best practice, nor is it sustainable. And that's why I created the parent communication logs and reports. It includes some editable contact logs for every type of communication, phone calls, emails, notes home, and more. It contains those positive note templates to encourage frequent connection and build trust through encouragement. It includes a parent survey to help you understand each parent's communication preferences and personalize your approach to that specific parent. And it includes meeting documentation pages so you can clearly track conversations, parent concerns, and those follow-up tasks. These forms give you a go-to place to keep everything organized and intentional so that nothing falls through the cracks. And most importantly, it helps parents know you, like working with you, and trust that you are doing everything you can to support their child. So at the end of the day, building trust with parents doesn't happen because we say the right things. It happens because we do the right things. And that means following through every single time. So if you are ready to make follow through a whole lot easier, check out the parent communication logs and reports resource. There's a link waiting for you in the show notes, or you can just head to www.spedprepacademy.com slash two eighty six. That's SPAD Prepacademy.com slash two eight six. Get instant access to those tools that will help you build parent relationships that are organized, consistent, and rooted in trust and get the parent survey and positive notes home as a bonus. Next week we will continue our November series with What Do You Do When the Conversation Gets Hard? We'll talk about how to stay calm, professional, and collaborative during those difficult meetings. See you next week.